The Onion

The numbers today

What happened lately

October 23, 2026 5.2x its usual first day SWAT Team Robot Successfully Dismantles Black Man The video opened at a pace of 133,739 views a day, 5.2 times a normal first day on this channel (25,790).

Video taking off 10x its usual first day

The Onion turns a fake Hegseth pledge into pundit logistics

In The Know's panel treats an invented promise to "kill everyone" as a question of campaign credibility rather than morality.

Channel: The Onion · Story of October 21, 2026

This week on the channel +2.1M views this week

The Onion reconvenes In The Know for a nonexistent presidency

Seven uploads mix a mock midterm debate with a train investigation written like a math problem.

Channel: The Onion · Story of October 17, 2026

This week on the channel 7 videos this week

One giant rutabaga becomes The Onion's food-stamp policy

The satirical USDA announcement has passed a quarter million views, far more than anything else the channel posted in seven days.

Channel: The Onion · Story of September 29, 2026

The video drawing the most views now

Is Pete Hegseth's Bold Pledge To 'Kill Everyone' By 2028 An Unrealistic Pipe Dream?

Video published

October 20, 2026

Video views so far

730,771

Video views, pace per day

99,465

Views on its first day

364,176

Position on Trari and in the category

The ranking by views counts only channels whose weekly number is available.

The channel's share of the category

0.9% of all views the category's channels gained this week

The channel's latest videos

The last 15 videos uploaded to the channel, with today's numbers. Click a video to play it here.

Video	Uploaded	Length	Views	Per day	First day	Likes	Comments
Super Hurricane Said to Be Even More Powerful Than Bogdan, …	October 23, 2026	0:42 short	7,923	12,041	7,923 (11 hours)	578	20
SWAT Team Robot Successfully Dismantles Black Man	October 22, 2026	1:52 short	126,351	38,372	112,142	7,238	528
The new revolution in democracy has arrived. Play The Onion…	October 21, 2026	0:44 short	25,722	4,788	18,352	1,786	52
"Just Give Me The Damn Sepak Takraw Ball"	October 21, 2026	0:53 short	17,759	2,287	12,818	1,042	49
Is Pete Hegseth's Bold Pledge To 'Kill Everyone' By 2028 An…	October 20, 2026	4:11	730,771	99,465	364,176	26,935	2,296
Study Finds Growing Gap Between America's Rich and Super-Ri…	October 19, 2026	0:49 short	25,508	919	15,373	1,713	74
Former Cult Leader Reveals How He Escaped Needy Followers	October 18, 2026	2:29 short	52,434	1,556	33,746	4,350	164
Trump Cancels Planned Livestream Of Jon Ossoff’s Execution	October 17, 2026	0:25 short	137,693	1,934	83,314	6,552	206
Trump Imposes 50% Tariff On Companies That Just Feel Chinese	October 16, 2026	0:36 short	76,248	2,579	34,063	4,611	219
Authorities Investigate Collision Between Trains From Chica…	October 15, 2026	2:34 short	449,647	5,653	255,345	18,089	941
How To Play Golf Against The Man Whose Wife You're Banging …	October 14, 2026	1:57 short	28,301	343	13,776	1,757	50
Will Trump Running For Midterm President Help Down-Ballot R…	October 13, 2026	3:27	383,333	7,258	195,966	13,560	1,181
Thousands Of Girls Match Description Of Missing Sorority Si…	October 12, 2026	1:17 short	50,976	1,265	26,333	3,159	91
Press Secretary Spins Wife's Death As A Positive	October 11, 2026	1:43 short	35,244	851	16,719	2,223	107
Prison Economy Spirals As Price Of Pack Of Cigarettes Surpa…	October 10, 2026	1:07 short	26,329	137	14,813	1,688	66

Audience engagement

likes per 1,000 views

43.8 in the category: 24.0

comments per 1,000 views

2.8 in the category: 1.1

a video's usual first day on this channel

30,923 views

short vs long

13 short (up to 3 minutes), 2 long
average views per short video: 81,548
average views per long video: 557,052

Most watched videos (not Shorts)

Video	Uploaded	Length	Views
Olympic Village Tour: See Where The Athletes Live, Train An…	February 13, 2014	2:48	36,168,769
Sex House - Meet The Nymphos - Ep. 1	July 12, 2012	8:12	35,292,200
Sexy Truth or Sexy Dare - Sex House - Ep. 2	July 19, 2012	7:14	34,491,200
Brain-Dead Teen, Only Capable Of Rolling Eyes And Texting, …	February 13, 2012	3:10	21,461,348
Back Of Library Smells Like Weed	August 12, 2013	1:44	19,953,272

Most watched Shorts

Video	Uploaded	Length	Views
Anonymous Hero Donates Hospital 200 Human Kidneys	May 3, 2025	0:42	9,345,234
Elon Musk airlifted to the hospital with severe burns after…	January 23, 2025	0:59	4,800,726
Judge Rules White Girl Will Be Tried As Black Adult	September 23, 2024	0:45	3,889,534
Finding Masculine Halloween Costumes For Your Effeminate Son	November 3, 2025	0:48	2,811,586
Scientists Successfully Teach Gorilla It Will Die Someday	March 29, 2025	0:58	2,301,651

What happened on the channel in the last 30 days

The days when the channel's numbers left the ordinary.

1. October 23, 2026Video taking offSWAT Team Robot Successfully Dismantles Black Man The video opened at a pace of 133,739 views a day, 5.2 times a normal first day on this channel (25,790).
2. October 22, 2026Views jumpThe whole channel ran that day at 1,081,193 views a day, 3.6 times a normal day (297,802).
3. October 21, 2026Video taking offIs Pete Hegseth's Bold Pledge To 'Kill Everyone' … The video opened at a pace of 317,160 views a day, 10 times a normal first day on this channel (30,923).Read the story
4. October 16, 2026Video taking offAuthorities Investigate Collision Between Trains … The video opened at a pace of 255,165 views a day, 9.9 times a normal first day on this channel (25,783).
5. October 14, 2026Video taking offWill Trump Running For Midterm President Help Dow… The video opened at a pace of 205,820 views a day, 8 times a normal first day on this channel (25,790).
6. October 9, 2026Video taking offThe new revolution in democracy has arrived. Play… The video opened at a pace of 84,564 views a day, 3.3 times a normal first day on this channel (25,783).
7. October 8, 2026Video taking offDNC Releases Preemptive Autopsy Into Why They Los… The video opened at a pace of 101,538 views a day, 3.9 times a normal first day on this channel (25,776).
8. October 2, 2026Video taking offChump To Receive No Compensation For Rescuing Chi… The video opened at a pace of 115,120 views a day, 6.1 times a normal first day on this channel (19,022).